I AM GOING TO CLONE MYSELF THEN KILL THE CLONE AND EAT IT / SAM PINK

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"I AM GOING TO CLONE MYSELF THEN KILL THE CLONE AND EAT IT"

sam pink

a few excerpts from CLONE:

"On the way to the mailbox today, I slipped on some ice and almost hit my eye on a tree branch. I regained my balance and continued on. The guy walking behind me laughed. He had every right to laugh because it was funny and he had no tie to the physical pain I could've experienced. However, if I had lost my eye, I would've walked up to him and held him down in the snow—and let the blood from my empty eyesocket spill into his laughing mouth. My mail was mostly crap about credit cards that I will never use."

"Today at the library, I walked up to someone sleeping in a chair and I gently shook her. She looked up at me through the hair covering her face. I put my hand on her forehead and said, “My child, you will not be forgotten by me, your holy father, the one who loves you and cleans you with the fleece of his chosen lambs. You will know my infinite love. And can I borrow eighty cents so I can buy a kit kat from that vending machine over there please?”

what people are saying about CLONE:

Blake Butler (editor of Lamination Colony and No Colony. Author of EVER from Calamari Press):

"Sam Pink exists in all things. Sam Pink's tremor is threaded through the dark sections of scenes in the first Back to the Future, the sections we generally think of as 'night.' Sam Pink gored his way to the center of the child Russell Edson and ate all the beautiful / smart / wicked / fucked / riotous / smarmy / unconditional parts about him, then went to incubate and redouble. Sam Pink absorbed the passing souls of Andy Kaufman, Anton LaVey, Klaus Kinski and Shel Silverstein and fried them in his mother's blood. When Sam Pink emerged he wasn't crying, but everyone in the hospital was, tears of whiskey, liquid gold and smegma, and within seconds of his first breath, all our Bibles were ripped in half, prefiguring this book here, this tumor, this thing that should not have a name. It is no exaggeration to say now, with a mouth full of blood, that Sam Pink is dire, is hilarious, is chewing up our future."

Sam Pink's neighbor:

"Look, I did what you said. I bought your shitty book. Now stop trying to light my dog on fire."

God:

"Sam, my son, I have heard your prayers and no, you can't 'like, totally drill Katie Couric.' Also, I regret creating you. This book made me lose faith in myself."